The New York Times reported today that thanks to his own incompetence leading up to the election, John Kerry's spine is now missing. After Howard Dean's success using cowardice and surrender with the war on terror, the NYT gave the impression that Kerry didn't take appropriate steps to guard his own spine and that it now might be in the hands of terrorists who are emboldened by his limp-wristed view of American defense.
John Kerry was quick to respond to the report, calling the NYT "irresponsible" for rushing to print with the story before checking it's facts. He stated "The fact of the matter is that my spine went missing long before the Howard Dean rise in the polls. All they had to do was look at my record, but they're apparently too lazy to check facts. In fact, some would dispute that the spine was ever even there in the first place. Inspectors were vague about what they actually found when they searched for my spine before I declared my candidacy for president."
CBS's 60 Minutes had been planning to run the blockbuster story on the eve of the election but ran into problems when a recent internal investigation found Dan Rather had lost his mind, his integrity, his judgment, and his testicles. Rather than have the story questioned due to these events, CBS chose to feed the story to the NYT for publication.
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