SAN FRANCISCO, California --- The San Francisco Bored of Supervisors voted today to ban outdoor smoking in the smelly, urine-stained, filthy city. An unforeseen repercussion of this new law, which will cost $800,000 to implement, is that Sean Penn will no longer be allowed into San Francisco.
"We absolutely love Mr. Penn's Communist ideology," said Supervisor Chris Daly. "Unfortunately, he smokes about 17 packs per day and actually emanates smoke from the pores in his skin all day long. He would be in constant violation of our new law and will not be allowed within city limits even if he doesn't have a lit cigarette."
The new law does allow for smoking marijuana and crack outdoors. It does not apply to homeless people. Mr. Penn was on a terrorist mission in Iraq prior to this weekend's elections and could not be reached for comment.


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