SAN FRANCISCO, California --- Mayor Gavin Newsom attacked Americans today who say that San Francisco does not support the military while he spoke at the annual Fleet Week celebration. He was shocked, utterly shocked, that people could begin to question San Francisco's support of the military.
"This is ridiculous, and I think the right wing haters are lying and making us look bad," said Newsom. "I mean except banning JROTC from our public schools in San Francisco, I don't think you'll find a more pro-military city. Well, and other than San Francisco Supervisor Sandoval saying we shouldn't have a military at all, I think we're about as patriotic as you can get. And then there's that whole weekly anti-war protest calling our soldiers murderers, but those aren't really city officials. I mean I guess city officials march and speak at those things, but they don't get paid for it. Okay, and then there was the deal when we refused to dock the USS Iowa as a floating museum because it represents military dominance. Even Diane Feinstein chastised us on that one. And maybe you could say that renaming Army Street to Cesar Chavez Street to rid the city of a connection to the military was something not quite pro-military. But other than that, I think you can say San Francisco is one of the most pro-military cities in the country. Seriously. This whole anti-military thing is just a fictional creation of right-wing lunatics who hate us. Nothing could be further from the truth."