CAMBRIDGE, Massachusetts --- Cambridge officials arrested and detained Boy Scouts in their town after a project to collect goods at voting locations to send overseas to the military. The arrests averted near disaster. All items collected by the Boy Scouts will be distributed to homeless shelters instead.
"It is very fortunate that we caught these little criminals in time," said Marsha Weinerman, Executive Director of the election commission. "Supporting anyone in the military is a political statement that is not allowed by law. If they want to support the troops, then they should start a petition to impeach Bush or refuse to take a bath until all of our baby killing soldiers are brought back home to stand trial. At least their efforts can benefit the real heroes of this country. The homeless drug users. These people struggle to survive against all odds in a country that is run by bigots and racists. They deserve these items instead."