ISRAEL --- Former President, Jimmy Carter, became so jealous of Barack Obama's desire to meet with all terrorists and enemies of America, that he has quickly embarked on his own mission called "A Journey of Hope, Change and Love for People Who Want to Kill Americans". His first stop will be with the head of Hamas.
"Barack has nothing on me," said Carter. "By the time this election rolls around, I will have met with all of America's enemies already. Hamas? Hugged and kissed them. Chavez? Will give him a Cuban cigar. Iran's Ahmapajamahead? I will kiss his feet while kneeling on an American flag. Kim Jong Il? I'll bring him some cash money. Osama bin Laden? I'll sneak in rocket launchers and box cutters for his needs. And I wont' stop there. I will go far beyond the feeble imagination of Mr. Obama. I will next meet with every murderer in prison. Some may say this is cruel to the families of the murder victims, but I am hopeful that I can be a communicator between the two sides and bring some understanding and peace. If the families of the murder victims don't understand or won't reconcile, then they only have themselves to blame. They are acting like George Bush would act. Or they're just dumb, bitter Pennsylvanians."